All intensive purposes, i am not feeling it today. I feel hormonal, fat, ugly, wrong, worthless and vulnerable to the point i want to hide from everyone. I feel alone, unlovable and sad. I am looking for purpose when I feel none. Not motivated, not strong, I drank last night and although I have done all things that should put me in a decent emotional state, i have not been successful. I realize greatly how much drinking is effecting my mood and I do not like this at all. I really put in the effort to get myself to a higher plane and I have failed. BLECH!!!